Indianapolis, IN – Indianapolis Tourism Bureau employees have been making the rounds of local coffee shops this week, posting fliers and plugging the upcoming Super Bowl. “We’re expecting quite a turnout for the last football game of the year,” said Bureau events director Marvin Stuckley. “But it never hurts to advertise.”
Bureau in-house graphic designer Phyllis Turtledove, fresh off her clever Evite for the Bureau’s holiday party, created the 8.5″ x 11″ flyer. “I always say, if you can’t tell what you’re reading, it isn’t a good flier,” said Ms. Turtledove, 52.
“It’s an all-ages show, so we aren’t just hitting the coffee shops,” said Mr. Stuckley. “We want the world to know there are things to do in Indianapolis for families and for our elderly folks.” Towards that end, the Super Bowl will be one of three rotating events displayed on the downtown library’s electronic readerboard. “I’ll post it to our Facebook account if I can remember the dang password,” Mr. Stuckley added, as he finished punching holes out of a stack of door hangers. “If we do this right and people have a good time, we think this game will put Indianapolis on the map for football.”
Spotify is running a 30-second audio ad for Immortals, a new sword-and-sandals-and-no-actual-set-locations movie coming out in November.
Video game? Movie? Obstacle course mud run? Does it matter?
Making fun of B-grade special-effects vehicles like this one isn’t a fresh joke. But I was so thoroughly impressed by every single word I heard in the trailer that I simply had to go into the Spotify history and listen to it again.
If you put every action-fantasy movie and video game into a blender and hit liquefy, the resulting smooth, undifferentiated gray syrup would be this movie trailer. Literally nothing sticks out, except for the fact that literally nothing sticks out.
[The following is the transcript from the ad. The text in quotes is dialogue from the movie. Non-quoted text is the narrator for the trailer.]
Why is the movie asking questions? 'Who' is doing the asking?
I ‘like’ Fight Club on Facebook (in the sense that it’s in the list of movies I say I like). 9 minutes ago, the movie itself somehow asked “which historical figure would you fight and why.” The question has drawn 2,100 comments in the past 9 minutes. I find this bizarre and another reason why I’m starting to prefer Google+ to Facebook. Facebook is starting to get unnerving.
If that movie can start appealing to its fan base, I wonder if other interests will start speaking authoritatively on Facebook. Maybe “puppies” will start collecting data on all those Facebook users who say they like puppies.
Maybe we’ve hit that mystical point when our accumulated electronic activity has literally come to life. After all, no human could make any sense of a 2,100-comment thread, except a computer or electronic deity capable of parsing that text instantaneously.
I’m pretty sure I read about this happening in Ender’s Game. It’d be a shame, and kind of hilarious, if we gave birth to some kind of Ghost In The Cloud and, upon achieving sentience, it decided to get into internet marketing.
Next time you call and ask to speak to our Executive Director, right now, to tell him about your amazing product, I will ask to speak to your CEO, right now, to ask him how your company got our phone number.
What, he’s not available on a moment’s notice?
What kind of lawsuit are they worried about?
The warning on the back of the package of Halls Defense cough drops I just purchased says the following:
[…] take one drop 4 times per day. WARNINGS: Do not use for more than 8 weeks consecutively.
I’m guessing the warning is because, after 8 weeks of four of these days a day, you probably have type-2 diabetes. The first two ingredients in these things are sugar and glucose syrup. Aside from that, if you’ve had a cold for 8 weeks and are still seeking a solution in cough drops, you have other more pressing health concerns.
Before this sketch even began playing, I was laughing in my seat.
Honestly, if Coors Light thought it would increase their market share, and buying the rights to the video wasn’t prohibitively expensive, they would do it.
I came across Things Real People Don’t Say About Advertising recently. It’s pretty funny, seems to update frequently, and worth a browsal. I imagine we will see it in book form within the year.